Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Sampai bilaaaa.

Soo sick of work.
Not even doing things i learnt for 4entire years of pharmacy school.
I cant see the relevance of the tasks i was given...rasa mcm kuli batak.

I am here because work is just 8hrs a day, 5 days a week.no oncalls. and i chose to be here because family time to me, to a lady is more important than profession. leave that passion to them boys. My core responsibility is to ensure makan minum pakai anak2 n suami terurus sahaja.

Sekarang core responsibility saya tunggang langgang. 

Last weekend we just discovered that tia identifies colours. eh, sejak bila pulak ni? see, i missed a frickin milestone.

Kesal,kesal,kesal.

Everyday i wish some kind of side income wud fall on my lap, some sort of part time work that which only requires 1-2days a week and could pay for my commitments. well...there is some sort of tiny light at the end of this long tunnel.very faint, very tiny dot of light. i was offered something which i wish for.but i havent received the actual call from the company, so i feel like that tiny source of light is still unreachable..n perhaps dimming away. actually there are 2 dots of light, cuz i have got 2 offers.

I meant to take 6months maternity leave..and i aim at the end of it all..never to return to work. i pray everyday that that would come true. Perhaps Allah will have some mercy, and could see what my heart is sincerely devoting itself to.

Heres a hug to all working mommies who:

  1. Scrolls through her phone photo album every hour because she misses her child/children.
  2.  Is at work for the money to provide a good life to her kids, n not for the love of their job.
  3. Has to struggle and pump milk for their babies in front of the office computer (n some while typing) instead of direct feeding,cuddling and bonding with them.
  4. Comes home from work too exhausted to care if laundry has been settled, if dinner has been cooked. 

I wanna keep this list short, because i could go on forever, and i know uve been reading a lot of this here and on the way to meluat-dom..so hey, big hug to all ok.


cheers,
Sabby

5 comments:

  1. hey sabby! we are on the same boat! ever since baby M was born, I kept thinking of quitting my current job (of which..ahem. suppose to be what I have always envisioned myself to be doing. I am a transport planner, trained in the city of soul.. return to malaysia, with all the hope that malaysian public transport could be any better!)

    When baby arrives, everything's changed! I thought I could be the career woman I always inspired to be, but I cant. Priorities change when you have families, no? now i wanted to stay at home and look after family..but I have a lot of what ifs! sigh. hope things are better at your end.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi nurza...yes exactly or maybe kind of on the same boat...probable difference is i never really envision myself being a devoted pharmacist. hehe...BUT it was bearable for 5 years til i got Tia...then from bearable turns to unbearable. out of 10 days i have like, 8 miserable days? and i've always felt like i belong at home with her. I guess its the motherly instinct kan.

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  2. i am all what u said to sab... scrolling the piccas all the time, rushing back home just to get those extra minutes to spend with aleena before she sleep, house chores or spend time with aleena. sigh

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. tu la:-/ miserable high five? fiiive. lol. jom beli toys banyak2 kat diorg hahah. walaupun some housewives came up with the saying "your presence means more than presents to ur child"

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  3. Awww.. babe. Reading this gave me a prickling feeling of how my mom must have felt back then. She was a working mom for as long as I remember growing up. Coming home to a sleeping baby must have been a heartbreaking situation for her. Now I want to go home and hug my mom.

    Good luck darling.

    -bahijah

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