Sunday, January 25, 2015

She said she doesn't love mommy anymore..

Tia just told me she wants to follow daddy go out because "i dont love mommy anymore."

These few days tia has been difficult. refuse to eat, wants choc n candies at mealtime, refuse to eat in school, watched ipad all day n throws tantrums if i take it away. so i have not exactly been "the fun mother".

So does it hurt? i'm sure she didnt realize what she just blurted out.

But it does. an awful lot. i mean, not to ungkit.but giving birth to her bukan senang. i carry this ugly csect scar and experience sampai mati.perhaps one day when she bathes mommy's jenazah she'll reflect thats looking too far.

its okay, she's still very little. she didnt mean it.but i know, one day when she goes through her adolescence i-dont-know-what-i-want phase, i'm definitely gonna get the "i hate you mommy" a few times.or many times. and i know, its going to hurt so bad seeing that i have given up so much to bring her then. i pray that Allah will give me strength to go thru that in the future. n so that i wont say out anything harsh due to sadness that will befall on her. kuatkanlah imanku nnt Ya Allah.

these few days actually terpikir n tergerak hati nak gi keje balik. it is true, when u stay at home everything turns into a routine for you. it tires u out. we usually will appreciate each other more if we dont see each other 24/7. duduk rumah jaga anak pn nnt bukan anak sayang sgt kat kita kan. sekian lah

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